One of the values that was instilled within me since a young age was the importance of work.✍🏻 As a child, I witnessed my parents logging long hours to provide for the family and I unfortunately found out early, sometimes things don’t go as you expect. Having lost my mom when I was seven, it always stuck in my mind that “shit happens” and you need a back up plan. 😕 To me, ensuring that I had enough money and could support my family was an important safety guard. ⚠️
As far as I can remember, I always had a job, if it was babysitting, folding clothes at my aunt’s boutique, dishing out food in the dorm cafeteria (embarrassing) 🙄or waitressing at a bar where your tips were in portion with how tight and short your shirt and skirt appeared. 💋👙🧳 Yes, I admit, I found myself going to work in ill fitting uniforms. Hey, I needed to be efficient with my time – return on investment (ROI) baby!!! 💵💵💵 Anyways, my strong work ethic continued as I pursued a career with long hours – minus the slutty clothes.👩🏻💼 I liked having meaningful roles and getting rewarded through promotions and gaining new responsibilities. When Robin and I decided to have Isabelle, we agreed that he would stay at home and I would continue my professional journey. I was happy to be the lead income as I really liked what I was doing and Robin was more acclimated to home and kid tasks. We made a good pair and it really worked for us as I have shared in previous blogs.😀
However, after Robin died, the joy of working changed for me. My priorities shifted and I knew I had to become more focused at home and being a parent to Isabelle.👩👧This was Robin’s sweat equity and I was not going to let him or Isabelle down. Upon reflection, I have to admit that I lost perspective for many years when I was out being a career girl on the importance of face to face time with Isabelle. There were events, game and quiet moments that I missed out on because I knew Robin had it covered.🧐 Only recently have I realized that I probably was away an few too many times and I regret not being tapped in. These days I am trying to be grateful for my life all that has happened may be our higher powers giving me a kick in the ass to pay attention to the things that matter. 🙏🏻😇 This leads me to the actual content of today’s blog which is taking down time to recalibrate and spend quality time with Isabelle before she leaves for college.🚘
If you were to ask old Risa – pre Robin’s death – being unemployed would have completely freaked her out. However, it feels completely right now and I want to make the most of this opportunity. 😎 I have embraced being uncomfortable and vowed to set personal goals and just go for it. Yet, the one thing I did not anticipate is how much I like not working. 🥳 I used to be so JUDGEY wondering what the moms’ (and Robin) did all day without a job when their children were somewhat independent (or aka.. in school most of the day) 🤨. I finally realize they were onto something that I never knew until now and it is fabulous – I love it!❤️ The only problem is that people ask me what I am doing with my time off and I can never truly articulate how full my days are … I am way to busy to work and that is for sure!!!🏃🏻♀️🏃🏻♀️
So what have I been doing? Well first of all, coming from a business world, I had to set priorities for myself. I mean I am a HR practitioner for g-d sakes! Here are my goals in no particular order: 1. Get Healthy (eating and exercise); 🥒2. Enhance relationship with Isabelle; 👯♀️3. Be a Traditional Mom (cook, clean, go to school stuff and pugs); 🍳4. Explore Spiritualty and Gratitude (the guiding force that has gotten me through these challenges); 🧚🏻♂️5. Pursue starting own business (HR consulting or writing a sitcom); 🦹🏻♀️ 6. Expand creativity (this blog, writing, learning) 🤓and 7. Having Fun (do things that I never had time to do, meet new people). 🤗
With those heavy goals … I am definitely down the path and on track with most of them well kinda maybe – ok not all. 💯1. Getting Healthy – I workout most everyday (Run, Zumba, Orange Theory, Yoga, Weight Training – love it) or feel guilty one the days I don’t; Eating Healthy (could do better but not entirely horrible but a little too carb heavy). 2. Enhance Relationship with Isabelle – We are finding our groove; Binge watching Madam Secretary (Season 5 and there are a ton of episodes – Elizabeth is a bad ass and our best shot at a democratic presidential candidate – please run); We went to orientation at MSU 💚and then enjoyed a fattening milkshake after (her idea); I am receiving political tutorials on presidential candidates from Isabelle and Bill Maher. 🤴🏻 3. Be a Traditional Mom – I am keeping the house in order; Continuing to purge unwanted stuff and donating it; Cooking for Isabelle (with her commenting last night – you don’t need to cook so much for me – I like to do it myself) – not sure how to take that feedback and; Assembled an electric snow blower following ambiguous instructions. 🌧🌧3. Awakening/Spirituality – I have been meditating daily and getting certified to be an Intuitive Practitioner (my current homework is cleaning chakras); Also wearing a lot of beaded bracelets – ha ha. In all seriousness really getting connected with source and gaining clarity. 4. Expanding Creativity – I am still blogging (and you thought I was gone); Exploring new recipes; Gardening (or was); Listening to podcasts for inspiration and business ideas and 5. Having Fun – I am hanging with my other unemployed friend Gilma and enjoying spontaneous lunches, shopping, long walks with pugs, massages, facials and just screwing around. 🛍🛍
If I put all frivolous stuff aside, I know this is an important moment and I am going to make the most of it. I am trusting my gut instinct and just not worrying about unemployment – at least – not for now. I am about one and half months in and feeling like I making some progress with my goals. It is time for me to get introspective and examine my life including strengths and areas for opportunities. In the past, there were responsibilities that I automatically punted to Robin and I think it is time to make up for lost time. I want this time to be special for Isabelle and me. I need to ensure she is well prepared and confident in her next steps as she transitions to college. I also want to make sure that I have no regrets as I too move forward.
So as a recap, I am enjoying being unemployed and recognize this is a short window of time for me to focus on Isabelle and myself. Although I cannot always articulate how I am filling my days, there is one thing I can confidently say… I may not be working but I am WORKING. In conclusion as this is getting very long…. I highly recommend it to anyone (who is fortunate to be rich or receive a generous severance) to stop and take stock of your life. Wishing everyone a very happy and healthy Thanksgiving. Talk to you soon or when I can find time to blog which is in fact one of my goals. Peace Out for now.