Backslide … for a moment

I made a promise when I started writing this blog that I would be authentic and real. So with that commitment, I am going to admit that in late January many of my old wounds from Robin’s death opened up again.๐Ÿ˜ฎ You see, I learned by an email to our subdivision that my next door neighbor had unexpectedly passed away. He left his wife and four children. I just could not believe that my neighbors would have to go through everything Isabelle and I experienced just a year and a half ago. As I was dealing with the shock of his untimely death, we also all heard the terrible news about Kobe Bryant, his daughter (and so many other precious lives lost) just a few days later. These awful events threw me right back to the morning my life changed forever. I felt sorry for the widows and all others affected by these tragic losses. I wondered if I was just living in a false sense of reality that was easily knocked down when someone became a new member of the widow/widower club. It made me realize that mourning is certainly a journey and sometimes you go two steps forward and then three steps back. It was an eye opener for me having truly believed that I was beyond these setbacks. ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

On a lighter note, I have been working towards starting my own HR consulting practice.๐Ÿ‘ฏโ€โ™€๏ธ It is my passion to help organizations realize their business strategy by employing effective solutions that ensure their workforce is motivated and aligned to deliver for the organization. More on this later… but talk about feeling outside out of your comfort zone.โš ๏ธ I have worked in large global companies my entire life and I really have confidence with my technical expertise yet starting a business is a whole new experience.๐Ÿคท๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ Thank goodness for friends and family that have walked this path before me.

A few weeks ago I became obsessed with finding a great name that would represent my new consulting brand. I took an entire weekend to brainstorm and annoy friends who were being helpful and polite as I sent random texts at all hours. ๐Ÿฅณ. Well after about 70 ideas, a few false positives, deep meditation, perhaps a whole order of Jetโ€™s crazy crust – I found the ONE! I will reveal it once things are official but let’s just say I have the website domain and paperwork has been submitted. ๐ŸŽ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽŠ

Which leads me to the next important piece – my professional image. I quickly realized that my sad picture on LinkedIn – shot by the famous photographer – Risa Borr (selfie from iPhone 7) was not going to get the job done for me. ๐Ÿ†˜ I finally decided it was time to get professional head shots that would send just the right vibe.…I am creative, straightforward yet highly competent and skilled yet not so serious and formal yet not too casual and not too old but definitely current. This was a tall order that was not going to come together without the right crew of make-up, hair and photography professionals. ๐Ÿ’„๐Ÿงš๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’ฐ Boy, do I miss those days where you could just look great without trying. NOW – you have to really try but look like you did not try at all. ๐Ÿคฌ A clever balance that I have just exposed to my large following for the blog. ๐Ÿ˜›

So to my last point as this story still unfolds, I went to Nordstrom to find that perfect jacket to wear in the head shot and I was feeling good until I visited the dressing room. ๐Ÿ™€Nordstrom really tries to provide a great experience for customers especially when they are trying on clothing. They have these mirrors that basically catch every angle in the convenience of your own dressing room. Earlier that evening, I had gone out to eat with my girlfriend Renee and believed I had worn a super cute and slenderizing outfit. However, one trip in front of the mirror told a completely different story. I was horrified as I examined my rear end in this 360 view – my self confidence deflated.๐Ÿ“Œ I guess long sweaters don’t always hide your large ass. ๐Ÿณ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ– Now in fairness to Nordstrom, at least they have a great ambience.๐Ÿ’‹ I won’t even give Macy’s a try cause their dressing rooms are always messy with that old fashion florescent lighting which makes even a super model look heavy and pale.๐Ÿคก Ok, letโ€™s move on … I bought the jacket ignoring the whole dressing room situation and pretended that my mirror at home would make everything all better. I am happy to report that my home reflection knocked ten pounds off and trauma neutralized – yeah !!!๐Ÿ‘ Well stay tuned for the final reveal of both my fabulous business name and headshot. For those who know it already – keep it on the down low until I am official.๐Ÿคž

So … that was my month – a few highs and still many lows as I tackle this bumpy road.๐Ÿฅƒ One day you want to laugh, the next day you want to cry and the next day you want to ban department store mirrors! ๐Ÿ˜• Sending much love and support to My neighbor and her kids. Rest In Peace my friend and say hi to Robin. ๐Ÿ˜‡๐Ÿ™๐Ÿป

3 thoughts on “Backslide … for a moment

  1. So excited for you and your new venture! You are right, starting a business is a completely different beast than corporate life…where we had the luxury of just doing our jobs. Now, we must wear additional hats like VP of Sales, CFO, CEO, VP Marketing, etc. etc. You go this!

    Liked by 1 person

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